FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS (Unless your dreams are stupid)

I think growing up is the first time someone tells you that you can’t do something.

For example I was about five or eight years old and I asked my mom if I could sing and be like Britney Spears and she said no hesitantly, shattering my fragile little dreams to pieces. But looking back, my dream was flawed anyway. I was much too involved with my Easy Bake Oven and burnt Cheese-Its to ever qualify for a crop top and Catholic school kilt. My mom might have told me no to Britney Spears, but she always said yes to two bagels at Einstein’s.

The most recent shutdown happened when I happily expressed another upside to switching out of a biomedical science major: I told my mom I could get a tattoo without worrying about it inhibiting me from getting a job. She wasn’t freaked out about me wanting a tattoo, but when I threw out some suggestions, she quickly shot down one idea in particular. “Not a pine tree. You don’t want a pine tree on your body.” Definitely less devastating than finding out I’ll never be Britney Spears, but slightly disappointing nonetheless. (As every sane boring normal person over the age of 30 howls with laughter at the idea of a pine tree tattoo. Freaking take a hike.)

So when people tell you that you can’t do something, take their advice into consideration. I’m not saying don’t follow your dreams, I’m just saying go to sleep for a little bit and see if your brain comes up with any better dreams. Because at this point in my life I’d much rather vie for the position of filling Jimmy Fallon’s coffee mug than dancing around with snakes. More money more snakes right?

Speaking of dreams, I’ve actually had two dreams where I met Harry Styles (and he’s not even my favorite 1D lad) but like hit me up universe I’m listening so Harry if you’re out there idk what’s going on but I think we’re supposed to be friends. Check out my Weebly account, bro. (That’s what people say in a dystopian society.)

I should definitely thank my mom for guiding me in the right (One) Direction. A pine tree belongs in the forest and I do not belong on stage. But some people do. The world can always (read: ehhh maybe) use more pop sensations to make the general public feel uninteresting and normal. And for that, Harry and Britney, I thank you.


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