Sorry, Boston

In my humble opinion, the definition of genius is subjective and relative and some other words ending in –ive.

For example, I say genius and people say Einstein. But ya know what? I actually have no freaking clue what Einstein did. In fact I see more quotes supposedly said by him that deemphasize intelligence and glorify creativity instead. I’m not saying he wasn’t a genius; obviously he was. I’m just saying that whoever figured out that we could take the round thing out from under a feral feathered creature, crack it open, and cook it into Lauren’s favorite breakfast food (kidding do you really think I’m decisive enough to pick a favorite) was also a genius.

My stroke of genius came today when I dipped my animal crackers into Boston cream pie yogurt. Usually I scoff at Yoplait in favor of the Greek variety but today the yogurt gods are the ones laughing as I stood in my dorm room reveling in my own creative masterpiece that probably seemed more delicious than it actually was at the time. In fact I’m over it by now. On to bigger and better things. BUT the creation sparked said reflection about geniuses and I guess if I have a point to ANY of this it should be that YOU yes you are some sort of genius and I pray to God that you have higher standards of geniuship than merely dunking processed animal-shaped pieces of my childhood into stuff that has to advertise “NO HIGH-FRUCTOSE CORN SYRUP” all over the lid. Maybe it’s just me, but I feel like we should live in a world where there should never be any question that yogurt is simply just yogurt. (Says the girl that purchased Boston crème ((cream?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!)) pie yogurt.)

I don’t know where this is going. I gotta ship off to yoga now so I can Namaste all this vegan-unfriendly nonsense out of my system.

Also I could probably just go look up the spelling of cream/crème. I’ve got another one of those yogurts in the fridge. #smh


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